Is anything sacred anymore?

My brain often works in funny ways. You know, how sometimes you'll think of something, which then reminds you of something else, which then reminds you of something else, and about five minutes later you're thinking about something totally unrelated to your first thought and you have no idea how you got there? Well, I always think like this. My mind is a mess. Messy, messy, messy. {That is a quote from the Disney movie Winnie the Pooh. My mind also recalls movie quotes all. the. time. But, that's just me.} So, the other day (a popular Southern phrase which can mean yesterday or 4 weeks ago), I was thinking about my blog. And then I thought about my most recent post on those awful, embarrassing photos. And then I thought about this girl I used to know who hated when I posted photos on Facebook of her because she often found them horrifying and did not want the entire Internet, a.k.a the world, to see her like that. And then I thought about how her frustration with my photo posting led me to no longer post photos on Facebook because it was too much work and too hard to please everyone. And then I thought about how I, in fact, do not like it when people tag me in Facebook photos, simply because I'm not entirely comfortable with my life appearing on computers across the universe. And then I thought about how I wish I could stop people from posting photos of me on Facebook altogether, but I can't, so at the very least I will continue un-tagging myself. And then, Say Yes to the Dress came on and I thought about my wedding. And then, my brain connected Facebook, my wedding and photographic privacy. Well, of course, a real debate began then.

After sampling the way my brain works, I'm not sure you're interested in reading this post anymore, but we'll give it a go regardless. Here are the facts. I am uncomfortable with the lack of privacy social networks such as Facebook create. Sure, I have a Facebook profile, but the information on it is extremely limited and my privacy controls rival the Pentagon. I guess I just feel exposed and somewhat violated. To me, the Internet is like a black hole. Once you drop something in it, you're not getting it back. You can post photos on Facebook and only let your "friends" view them and you can even take them down after a limited time, but the reality is, they are gone. Someone could have grabbed some of those photos from your album, sent them to so-and-so, who sent them to so-and-so, who saved them to her hard drive, which was eventually stolen by a gangsta who created a sick shrine of your photos in his apartment. Now, I know this is an exaggeration, but the point is, once those photos go up, you don't know where they go. They are no longer yours, they are essentially the property of the Internet. That being said, I am uncertain that I want my wedding, an intimate, private, cherished event, to be dropped into the black hole of the Internet.

It's not entirely a vanity issue - I don't freak out when others post ghastly photos of me, I tend to laugh it off and remind myself to never look that hideous again - but, it would be sort of annoying to plan, prep and dream of this wedding only to check my phone while boarding my plane for my honeymoon and find blurry, badly shot photos of my special day on the Internet. So, there's that. Plus, as I argued above, I just think it's a private event. I'm not the Bachelorette getting married on ABC or a Kardashian girl. The entire universe is not supposed to witness my wedding. And while people will come and snap photos galore (which is totally fine by me), for the purpose of keeping them or sharing them in real life (not the web) with others, posting them to Facebook shares them with everyone.

I bet at this point, you're thinking, "April does not plan on posting photos of her wedding on Facebook." And, you're right. But here's the thing, I don't think I want others to either. This is where the debate gets tricky. I read a lot of wedding blogs and this is a hot issue. Some girls believe it is totally "bridezilla" to ask guests (via word of mouth or signs on the tables) to not post photos of the event to Facebook. While other girls believe weddings are sacred and not to be viewed on Facebook. Some girls even attempted a compromise by setting up an online photo sharing account with programs such as Shutterfly (these programs have a user name and password) and inviting guests to post photos there. This enables all the guests to view and share photos, yet it is much more protected and limited than Facebook.

Obviously, my mind is very messy regarding this topic. There is a lot to think about and the last thing I want to be is a "bridezilla." But, it's 2010, and it will be 2012, and the Internet is a huge part of people's lives. Issues of Internet etiquette regarding weddings are bound to come up. My wedding day isn't just another day to me, and while I love that people will want to excitedly show others snapshots of that special day, I'm not sure Facebook is the appropriate way. Plus, uploading photos to Facebook is so easy now, that it often becomes a distraction and annoyance. For example, I attended weddings where members of the wedding party and guests were constantly uploading photos from their cell phones to Facebook as the wedding was happening. Would it kill people to put the phones down for one day and take a breath and celebrate something so incredibly special? Maybe I'm crazy. Maybe uploading photos to Facebook (while you're at the wedding or after) is people's way of celebrating something special. So, help me out. What do you think? This is a topic I could really use some opinions on, so let it fly.