Tackling Tacky

Engagements bring many joys, one of which is the registry. I cannot wait to register. I cannot wait to hold that little gun scanner thingy in my hand and zap, zap away. With our long engagement, Adam and I are waiting until closer to the wedding to register. We don't want to register too early for fear of items on our list discontinuing. Plus, we just want to save the registry process and still have it to look forward to. That being said, not everyone is a fan of the registry. Case in point, my mother. My mother loves purchasing gifts and always puts a great deal of thought into what she buys. She is a fervent opponent of the gift card, as she thinks it lacks the personalization a gift should contain. My mom does not like registries because she believes they suck the fun out of buying gifts by simply telling people what to get the couple. While she can see its purpose for items that need to match, such as dishes or sheet sets, she doesn't see its purpose otherwise. I of course, disagree, and often remind my mother that while she loves purchasing gifts and pondering about what to buy, not everyone does. Some people find it helpful to be given a wish list, especially people who do not know Adam and I well enough to know what we already own and/or want and hate trying to think of a gift to buy. I imagine a lot of people agree with my mom and a lot of people agree with me.

Registries are a hot button issue, and a lot of the debate surrounds the tackiness of it all. There are two tacky issues surrounding registries that concern me, so I thought I'd turn to the blogosphere to hash them out. First, many people (mostly older, I'll admit) find it tacky to register at stores other than the traditional department stores or a Target/Bed, Bath and Beyond variety. Many couples are now registering at stores such as REI for camping gear and outdoors equipment. Personally, I love this idea. If a couple enjoys camping or other outdoor activities, why shouldn't they register for those items? Plus, as a purchaser of many a wedding gift, I would have loved the option to buy the bride and groom a lantern or set of croquet clubs instead of a boring toaster. Adam and I would love to register for non-traditional items at non-traditional stores, but is it tacky? What do you think?

The second tacky issue involves notifying people of your registry. Basically, you shouldn't. (There he is, evil Should...I told you he lurks around corners and blindsides you.) It is apparently tacky to put registry information on your invitation because it implies that every guest should bring you a gift. Some people think it is not tacky to put a separate card in with the invitation that contains your registry information, but the jury of tackiness is still out on this one. Most people suggest using word of mouth and encouraging both sets of parents to spread the news to each side of guests. Or, with technology running rampant today, a lot of couples are advertising their wedding website on the invitation and then listing their registry information on their website. This is sort of a tacky loophole. So, what do you think? What is the best way to notify guests of a registry? Now, you know how I feel about Should, but in this case I certainly don't want our guests to think we are greedy, little bitches who only want them to come to the wedding so they can bring us a fabulous gift. Speak your mind below and let me know how to avoid being tacky.